Doombah GizzardDooodle

MY NEW NAME IS IN THE SUBJECT. DON'T LAUGH UNTIL YOU FIND OUT WHAT YOUR NEW NAME IS. We all need a little stress-reliever! This only takes a minute. Please don't be a bore and ruin it. Here is your dose of humour...

A. Follow the instructions to find your new name.
B. Once you have your new name, put it in the subject box and forward it to friends and family and co-workers. Don't go all adult - a senior manager is now known far and wide as Dorky Gizzardsniffer.

The following is excerpted from a children's book, Captain Underpants And the Perilous Plot of Professor Poopypants, by Dav Pilkey, in which the evil Professor forces everyone to assume new names...

1. Use the third letter of your first name to determine your new first name:

First Name

a = snickle	b = doombah	c = goober	d = cheesey
e = crusty	f = greasy	g = dumbo	h = farcus
i = dorky	j = doofus	k = funky	l = boobie
m = sleezy	n = sloopy	o = fluffy	p = stinky
q = slimy	r = dorfus	s = snooty	t = tootsie
u = dipsy	v = sneezy	w = liver	x = skippy
y = dinky	z = zippy

2. Use the second letter of your last name to determine the first half of your new last name:

First Part of Last Name

a = dippin	b = feather	c = batty	d = burger
e = chicken	f = barffy	g = lizard	h = waffle
i = farkle	j = monkey	k = flippin	l = fricken
m = bubble	n = rhino	o = potty	p = hamster
q = buckle	r = gizzard	s = lickin	t = snickle
u = chuckle	v = pickle	w = hubble	x = dingle
y = gorilla	z = girdle

3. Use the third letter of your last name to determine the second half of your new last name:

Second Part of Last Name

a = butt	b = boob	c = face	d = nose
e = hump	f = breath	g = pants	h = shorts
i = lips	j = honker	k = head	l = tush
m = chunks	n = dunkin	o = brains	p = biscuits
q = toes	r = doodle	s = fanny	t = sniffer
u = sprinkle	v = frack	w = squirt	x = dinck
y = hiney	z = juice

Thus, for example, George W. Bush's new name is: Fluffy Chucklefanny. Remember that children laugh an average of 146 times a day; adults laugh an average of 4 times a day. Put more laughter in your day.