Wednesday, July 27, 2005

Form the Blazing Sword!!!

Everyone knows that the there will be a Transformers movie that is going to be released in 2007. What I am hoping to be the first to report in my little group of friends is that there has been announced a new Voltron: Defender of the Universe movie. Apparently two guys at New Line bought the right Voltron and then brought the project to Mark Gordon. This guy did do Speed so it should be a good film... It just will not have a good cast. He also did The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. Which I was not to crazy about... Bring on the flame war... Fish once said that I expect every film to be great that's why I do not like so many films... Cut come on look at LXG it was lame... The only character who had any depth was Dorian Gray and he had the smallest part of all the main characters. Stuart Townsend is a good actor... He would have been a lousy Aragorn but still. The truth of the matter is that I do not expect every movie to be great but I do expect them to be interesting... Come on $10.00 for a damn movie ticket. Let me tell you... If I spend ten dollars on a movie... That is no longer two hours of entertainment... that is an investment into the Hollywood industry.

Back to Voltron... It appears that Voltron is a very lucrative commodity to have the movie rights to... It has generated $750 million in worldwide licensing and nearly $200 million in toys and merchandising since 1984. For the record... the Lions were the best Voltron. Followed by the space ships with the vehicles as a very distant third... after all it took 15 people to make vehicle Voltron. One person would get a hangnail and the world was in jeopardy because they could not assemble to make the robot.

So here it goes... two giant robot pictures from the 1980's. Now that we have Transformers and Voltron all we need is the Thundercats. [Note: They are going to release the Tundercats on DVD soon.] [On totally unrelated news... My birthday is coming up.] If they do make a Thundercats movie, it could either complete the holy Trinity of my child hood. Or it could be the trifecta from hell. Why is are all of my childhood dreams being destroyed... Why not make a He-Man movie next... They can have Calista Flockhart play Skeletor. For those of you who do know know how this movie will work.. It will be something like this
1. I'll form the head!
2. Form blazing sword!
3. ???
4. Profit!

They could make this more permanent. Such as "Voltron Office Of Home Land Security.

Bastards... While you're at it, go back in time and kick my dog, slash my bike tires, and burn down my fort. I swear this movie ticket better come with 20 hours of free therapy. Anyone who watched the show knows that it was basically the same thing every week... and that was to kill the beast thing with sword. And there were so many recycled action sequences it was not even funny. This movie is going to suck but you know what... I am going to watch it anyway... And you know what... I will probably like it... Damn you inner child. And for anyone who knows me knows that when I say Inner child I mean the whole Von Trapp family.

I have provided a good picture in the music link to show how Transformers are NOT as cool as Voltron... Let the flame war begin... Also the following link provides one of the funnies Voltron movies I have ever seen... It takes a while to download but I swear it is totally worth it... [note there might be an error message when it tries to play in media player... Just hit YES.]

p.s. I am going to slap the first small child, with a hockey stick, that gets it wrong and says that Voltron is a just like Power Rangers.


Extra Reading

0 comments: