I Like Cake!

So here I sit in front of the Jewish museum... I have been meaning to come here for quiet a while... Wait... let me start from the beginning. I should introduce a friend of mine... I have been hanging out with this person for the better part of four months... at first she was just someone to go out with to have a few beers... Then she invited me to go to see a few museums with her. In one day we visited The Guggenheim, The Frick Collection and The Whitey Museum of American Art.

It was an insane day... In one day I had seen more museums than I had seen in the last two years... My favorite was the Frick. I really liked all the religious paintings. I do not know why but I really liked that stuff. The way all the artists portrayed religious icons was really interesting. My least favorite was The Guggenheim. They had this exhibit called the Eye of the Storm. All it was was a wall of mirrors going down the center of the building... I was really annoyed at it... While we were standing there I just said, really loud, "That's it... A wall of Mirrors... You could see that in a JCPenney changing room." Everyone in the museum was really pissed at me. Another thing that annoyed me in the Guggenheim was this exhibition by Rirkrit Tiravanij. It was by far the dumbest exhibition I had ever been too. All it was was information about sine waves... On one wall they had written information about electrical energy that could have been taken out of a DeVry text book. Then on the floor was this pile of blue prints and next to the pile of blue prints was this box of rubber bands... People were walking around the pile staring at it like it was a piece of the art collection... That is until I walked right up to it and rolled one of the blue prints up and took a rubber band... Let me tell you one lady almost had a heart attack that I was destroying the art... Until she realized that she was idiot for thinking that a pile of papers was art. By the time we left the room nearly everyone had taken a poster... I hate starting trends... The same thing happened at the Frick... There were these old chairs and I just sat down on one... This time this old man gave me this dirty look. But by the time I left the room... Every chair that could be sat on was occupied... I hate starting trends...

The next time we came back to the city we came for the sole intention of going to the Jewish Museum... On a Saturday... In a brilliant move of miscommunication and unforeseen cultural ignorance we went to the Jewish Museum on Saturday... On the day of the Shabbat. We still had a great time... The fist time we came to the city I said something along the lines of... "wow it's such a nice day. We should have parked on the East side and then walked across the park." She said, "No." She said she had already seen Central Park. Apparently one day is enough to see 843 acres. Thats 3.4 km² for you Europeans out there... That is 153 square city blocks...

Then as the day comes to an end she says something that describes her quiet well...

"You know... It's such a nice day... We should have parked on the East side and walked across." I stop dead in my tracks and just look at her and she laughs and walks away.

So next time we come to the city, on the day that we are supposed to go see the Jewish Museum, she says oh lets park on the East Side... Of course she has to park on Riverside... So that is 5 blocks across the Island then we have to walk across the park...

While we walk across the park we hit the Reservoir... We start walking south, or counter clockwise to the Reservoir... We are all the way to the right as people pass us on the left... Then out of no where this lady is running in the opposite direction... I make some of handed reference to that and my friend says... "Whats wrong with that is that a rule? Is that written somewhere?" As she says that we pass a sign that along the path way that clearly states that people should run counter clockwise around the Reservoir... I was very amused with myself... It was one of those things where the timing could not be any better...

We get to the Jewish Museum and when we realize that the museum is closed she asks if we can go to the American Museum Of Natural History. It was nice... We went to the room with all the Seals and the big whale... We also spent time in the Rose Center for Earth and Space. We saw the Passport to the Universe show. It was narrated by Tom Hanks. Then we went to The New York Historical Society... There we saw the First Ladies of New York and The Nation. It was and exhibition about the Eleanor Roosevelt and Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis. It was nice to learn about these two great women that helped change the landscape of the city... All in all it was a good day...

The great part about that week was that two days later we went to see the Home of Franklin D. Roosevelt and the Vanderbilt Mansion in Hyde Park. It felt kind of cool that we were doing that since we had just been to the Historical Society.

Anyhow... Back to the Jewish Museum... They are having a great exhibit on the book, Where the Wild Things Are. So far this day has been kind of interesting... It took me 45 minutes to get from my house to 92nd street. I should have parked around 81st street so I could just walk across the park... But There was this guy who was struggling to fit penis extender (SUV) into this parking space so when he gave up I just parked in there in two moves just to show him.

Well I walked across and as soon as I got into the park I was stopped by someone I used to know. I took me 45 minutes to cross the park...

So in conclusion, it takes me the same amount of time to drive 22 miles as it does to walk across three city blocks... make note. Actually in conclusion it is nice to know how much my friend is changing my life... for some reason I had never really had that much interest in all of these things but now I am going to museums on my own... It's cool... I really like it...


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