My Small Car Blues

As I have mentioned before I have a very little car... I really like small cars... I have this friend of mine that really like big cars. Actually I have two of them.. and they are both girls... And they are both short. I wonder what that is all about. I do not really like SUV's I figure that if you are not driving that SUV out in the mud at least once a week then that SUV is just a status symbol. If you have an SUV that has a leather interior then you are missing the point. If you are using Spray-On-Mud then you are officially a looser.

I am so happy that SUV sales have been falling this year... People were buying SUV's for safety but now that gas prices are going up the sale of SUV's is going down. That's great guys. I am happy that you have out the price of your safety at $2.36 / gallon.

There are only a three SUV's that I like... The Nissan Xterra because in the commercials the Nissan is actually driving through dirt. The other SUV that I like Jeep Wrangler. Because it was used by the army and it is really tough... (Did you know that Jeep stands for G.P. or General Purpose.) The third and final one is the Land Rover Freelander because for 75% of the world's population the first car they saw was the Land Rover.

When I mentioned this to one of my SUV loving friends she said I thought you liked the Hummer. I replied... "I was not talking about the car."

There is that line that everyone knows that I say... "an SUV is just a penis extender." There are those who disagree... but hen I read about this study from Cornell University researcher Robb Willer. Apparently the participants were randomly assigned feedback that indicated their responses were either masculine of feminine. The people who had their masculinity threatened also said they felt more ashamed, guilty, upset and hostile than those whose masculinity was confirmed, he said. While in this state those people had a tendency of supporting war more and wanting SUV's more...

That's it right there. Small penis... drive an SUV... it's all in the science.


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